Rethinking Control, Part 3: 15 Things You Can Control Right Now

If you’ve read the first two parts of this series, you’re already aware that there’s so much in life we simply can’t control no matter how much we want to. Losing control, or realizing we never had the control we thought we had, causes us distress that often turns into anger. For those of us …

Christmas Hope for Foster/Adoptive Dads

Merry Christmas, fellow foster/adoptive dads, however it may find you. I absolutely love Christmas, but it can also be a particularly stressful time for foster/adoptive dads. The family is all together just a bit too much, the budget’s a little (or a lot) tighter, the chaos of the festivity can be overwhelming for the kids, …

Rethinking Control, Part 2: Anger as a Reaction to Loss of Control

The following is the second part of a series of articles all about taking a fresh look at control, particularly when it comes to raising children. To read part one, click here. In the time I’ve spent both as a foster/adoptive dad and knowing/working with other foster/adoptive parents, I’ve noticed that we have a tendency …

Poetry: The Pilgrim’s Hallelujah

I saw a pilgrim on his way, It seemed to power and to fame. I followed to escape the fear of feeling. If, in his constant company, If, in his steps, a man I’d be, Then none would see I’m desperate for healing. . He marched as if by siren’s song, But then I feared …

Rethinking Control, Part 1: Recognizing What You Can and Can’t Control

The following is the first part of a series of articles all about taking a fresh look at control, particularly when it comes to raising children. We hope this content is beneficial for you and that you'll stay tuned for more. If you read almost any parenting book, one word that will almost undoubtedly get …

An Upside-Down Way to Address Defiance in Children with Trauma Histories

Few things frustrate me more as a dad than defiance from my fourteen-year-old son when I tell him to do something and he either ignores me or flat out refuses to comply. It makes my blood boil and all I want to do is fly into a rage. After all, this is: my house he's …

Guest Post: Train Up a Child, by Scott DeLoach

Let’s start with full disclosure: I am not a foster dad. But I am a foster grandpa turned adoptive grandpa and a transracial adoptive dad, as well as a biological dad and a biological grandpa. Four kids came into our house through birth, and one through adoption. Two of my kids have ADHD, one has …

Embracing the Tension of Adoption

Today is National Adoption Day, and, since I am an adoptive dad, it seemed appropriate for me to write today’s article. But as I considered my angle, I was torn between the desire to talk up how beautiful adoption is and the responsibility to acknowledge how heartbreaking adoption is as well. There is an inherent, …

Opportunity is in the Interruption

I hate devotionals, mostly because just about anyone can write one (such as that world-renowned New Testament scholar Sarah Palin) and thus there’s no real guarantee or even likelihood that they present any accurate biblical truth. That being said, this article is, for all intents and purposes, a devotional, but I refuse to call it …

Emergency Care: A Short-Term Way to Make a Big Difference

Today’s thoughts are dedicated to my parents, who likely didn’t get much sleep until perhaps I was a teenager.  And have made it known that I'm getting what I deserve when one of my kids keeps me up! Warning: This article will end up being a little PG-13, but please forgive me for that--I’m only …