An Upside-Down Way to Address Defiance in Children with Trauma Histories

Few things frustrate me more as a dad than defiance from my fourteen-year-old son when I tell him to do something and he either ignores me or flat out refuses to comply. It makes my blood boil and all I want to do is fly into a rage. After all, this is: my house he's …

Guest Post: Train Up a Child, by Scott DeLoach

Let’s start with full disclosure: I am not a foster dad. But I am a foster grandpa turned adoptive grandpa and a transracial adoptive dad, as well as a biological dad and a biological grandpa. Four kids came into our house through birth, and one through adoption. Two of my kids have ADHD, one has …

Embracing the Tension of Adoption

Today is National Adoption Day, and, since I am an adoptive dad, it seemed appropriate for me to write today’s article. But as I considered my angle, I was torn between the desire to talk up how beautiful adoption is and the responsibility to acknowledge how heartbreaking adoption is as well. There is an inherent, …

Road Trip for Foster and Adoptive Dads: Why You Need to Go!

A few weeks ago, Dave and I loaded up his VW Bus and hit the road for a stirring expedition into the untamed wilderness of the Colorado Rocky Mountains. On a mountain high above Colorado Springs, some top-notch men were putting on a non-conference, non-retreat specifically for foster and adoptive dads called Road Trip. Typically …

Low-Oxygen Thoughts from the Manitou Incline

I mentioned on Wednesday that Zach and I attended Road Trip for Dads, and that once the event was over we attempted to conquer the Manitou Incline, as it had defeated us a few days prior. The Incline is incredibly steep. It climbs from 6,600 feet elevation above sea level to 8,590 feet in less …

8 Habits That Make Me A Better Dad

I don't know about you, but I learned a lot about myself when I became a dad. Unfortunately, most of what I learned is that I'm not as good or strong a man as I thought I was. This isn't to say that I discovered I'm some horrible monster because I didn't. Rather, fatherhood uncovered …

I Am Not a Saint

Every once in a while, I'm suddenly struck anew by the fact that I have a teenage son. It's particularly bizarre because of my young age and because of the fact that until a little over a year ago I didn't have any kids. Similarly, when I hear those AdoptUSKids “What to Expect When You're …

Guest Post: The Peculiar Thing[s] About Fostering, by Jon Williford

Today's guest post was written by Jon Williford. Jon has been a foster parent for four years and he and his wife are passionate about caring for children with special needs. If you'd like to write a guest post for The Foster Dads, click here! ----- Special-needs fostering is not what we wanted. We’re foster …

This is Hard, But We’re Doing It

My wife and I finalized the adoption of our teenage son a couple weeks back and, unlike when he first moved in with us a year ago, there was no honeymoon period. Even though we were adamant about being realistic, we quietly hoped that making everything official and legal would curtail the testing behaviors that …

Some Practical Things You Can Do to Help Out the Foster Dad in Your Life.

I find that these posts are easier to write when I’m feeling a little emotional.  Maybe that takes the edge off some of my cynicism or something, I dunno. They’re also easier to write when I’m enjoying a beer and/or a stogie on the back deck, but that’s another story. This evening I have the …